


Unspoken Words

by planet_plantagenet



Category: The Tempest - Shakespeare
Genre: Alternate Universe - Science Fiction, Angst, Emotional Manipulation, M/M, Post-Canon, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-05
Updated: 2016-07-05
Packaged: 2018-07-21 19:58:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 886
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7401778
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/planet_plantagenet/pseuds/planet_plantagenet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Antonio sort of feels sorry for Sebastian, in a way. Set after the events of the Tempest.<br/>Also, Antonio is ace/aro in this fic.</p><p>Sort of a sequel to "Bright Green Eyes", but can be read as a stand-alone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Unspoken Words

From the moment I met Sebastian, his feelings for me were painfully clear. When we were together, he stuttered, blushed, nervously fingered the hem of his shirt. Whenever our eyes met, he would hastily look away, and whenever my fingers accidentally brushed against him, he would flinch.

I’d always found the idea of a crush a fascinating—if unnerving—concept. How was it possible, to be so deeply emotionally invested in someone that way? It seemed to make people so fragile, so pliable. What was that love story where the protagonist commits suicide after their lover dies? I’d always scoffed to myself when hearing that tale—surely attraction couldn’t drive someone to ends so drastic.

But then Sebastian had come along, and fallen hard—for me, of all people. So I began to experiment. Would Sebastian really do anything for me?

At first it was simple things. Get me a book from my bookshelf. Lie to Prospero; tell him I didn’t feel well enough to come to the political meeting today. Convince the shuttle pilot to give me a free ride to Merak.

And Sebastian would do it, driven by the twisted hope that, if he performed every task I gave him, then perhaps I would like him back.

So I played this game—and I must admit, it was fun. I deliberately made my feelings ambiguous. I would flirt with Sebastian, hint that perhaps I did feel something for him. And that would drive him further into his madness.

How far would he go?

I paced around my quarters, feeling the steady vibration of the ship’s engines under my feet. Replaying the events of the previous day.

I’d almost convinced him to kill his own brother.

Would he have done it? That’s what I kept asking myself as I listened to my own footsteps and heartbeat in the dark. If the king hadn’t woken up, would Sebastian have killed him?

I didn’t want to know the answer. There was something very strange going on on that planet. I’d noticed it the moment we walked out of the crash without a blemish on our uniforms. All thanks to Prospero’s damn magic. But could it have impacted our minds as well?

Would I have killed Gonzalo? I think I would.

But I wasn’t worried about my own conscience. I’d never had one, anyways. No, I was worried about Sebastian. He’d never been the bloodthirsty sort before. Hell, he squealed like a kid at the sight of blood.

I stopped my pacing. Whatever magic was on that planet had changed something in me, for better or for worse. I’d never been so concerned about Sebastian before. In my eyes, he’d always just been something to play with. But maybe he was something more.

Not that I felt any sort of love for him. No, that was definitely not the case.

Perhaps I felt sorry for him.

I walked over towards the door, pulling it silently open. Whether I wanted to or not, I had to talk to Sebastian.

-

Sebastian was awake too, sitting on his bed with his knees drawn up to his chest. The only light came from a lamp beside his bed. I saw him look up nervously when I slipped into the room.

“Antonio.” His voice was hoarse.

I shut the door behind me, but didn’t approach. “You’re up late.”

“S-so are you,” Sebastian replied. I noticed his stutter, having vanished on the planet, was back.

“I…” I paused, thinking of how to phrase my thoughts. “I had a question.”

He folded his legs into a criss-cross position. “Yes?”

I didn’t reply immediately, walking over to the bed and sitting down across from Sebastian. I could feel his eyes on me, anxious, expectant. I sighed, finally looking back at him.

“On the planet,” I said quietly, “would you have killed Alonso?”

Sebastian tensed. His eyes went to his hands, twisting the bedsheets around his fingers. Finally he breathed, “I don’t know.”

“I don’t think you would have.”

He shut his eyes. “I don’t know. I don’t want to th-think about it.”

“You’re not a killer, Sebastian.”

He stopped fidgeting. The only noise in the room was the sound of his breath. After a second, he said, “I didn’t think I was, either.”

“You’re not,” I repeated.

“I hope you’re right,” Sebastian murmured.

“Listen. Look at me.” I reached out, tilted his chin up so his brown eyes made contact with mine. He flinched, but didn’t look away. I exhaled again. “I… look. I guess what I’m trying to say is, well, it’s my fault. You did all those things because of me. Because you liked me, and you wanted me to like you back.”

Sebastian didn’t respond. He shut his eyes. I could feel him trembling.

“Sebastian,” I whispered, “I’m not in love with you.”

He slowly opened his eyes, and I noticed them glistening in the light of the lamp. The silence between us was almost tangible, like I could feel the unspoken words swirling around in the darkness.

I stood abruptly. “I’m sorry. I should go.” Sebastian’s gaze followed me as I hurried towards the door, pulling it open. Then I paused, looked back at Sebastian. Silent tears dripped down his face.

“I’m sorry,” I breathed again, and ran out of the room.


End file.
